Twilight Premiere

17 WAYS TO HAVE SOME SERIOUS FUN WHEN GOING  TO SEE TWILIGHT!

1. Bring a cardboard cut-out of Robert with you. Say he’s your “date”
2. Go with several friends. Wear blackrobes and look sinister. Claim to be the Volturi.
3. Separate the theater crowd Team Edward on one side, Team Jacob on the other side and Team Switzerland in the middle.
4. Throw popcorn at your enemy side from #3.
5. Bring a relatively large dog to the theater and say “its Jacob..”
6. Wait by the door, and when people try to walk in, shove.. them out and yell “I will not share..!!!”
7. look at someone as if you’re going to eat them start licking your lips and smile evilly.
8. go up to the food serving bit and ask for human blood if they refuse, reply with ‘oh fine I’ll have animal’
9. walk up to someone smell them and then say “no offense but you smell like a DOG!”
10. Walk up to a stranger and tell you that you have imprinted on them and that they now belong to you, then sit by them the whole time!
11. Scream “DOG!” Whenever Jacob appears onscreen
12. Scream “BLOODSUCKER!” When Edward admits he’s a vampire
13. Scream “Yes! Edwards gonna score!” when he and Bella kiss
14. Where gold eye contacts and say you’re Edwards long lost cousin
15. When you see the words ‘Robert Pattinson’ come on say ‘Whos Robert Pattinson? I thought Spunk Ransom was in this? Wheres Spunk..?!’
16. Use your dog as a space heater when camping outside the theater the night before the movie releases.
17. When you see someone eating popcorn/candy go up to them and say “You brought a snack?”

Low Lifes and Their need for a job!

So the new year started out good! Then, life happened.

On Jan 3rd, Saturday night, some low life smashed out our window on the passenger side front with a flashlight and stole everythng out of our Durango.

If they would have just stopped with our stereo, I might not have been so upset and felt so violated. But no. They didn’t stop there. They went as far as to steal my daughters bookbag, coloring books, Christmas presents that were still in the truck from Family. (acquired from a late Xmas with them).

We had been out that day, visiting, and running errands, and Hubby was running late to work, so we grabbed what we could out of the truck, and figured we would get the rest when he got off work. WRONG!

They ripped opened packages, and took out what they wanted and threw the packaging back into the truck. They stole CD’s, some of which were very hard to come by in the first place. Cell phone charger, IPOD accesories, insurance papers out of the glove box, my daughters crayons. And  a ton more stuff. And Sadly, not only did he take his TIME going through everything (32 minutes to be exact) he did it all while being taped from the camera we were parked in front of. They know who he is, and they still have not recovered are stuff, or even found him.

So now we are replacing a window, HE BROKE, replacing OUR stereo that he HELPED HIMSELF to. Get a fucking job and buy your own shit. One thing I can’t stand is a thief. That is the lowest bullshit crime there is. Everything that we own, that he took, he could easily have bought for himself if that fucker had a job. Oh, wait a minute. I guess he didn’t have time to get a job considering he had only gotten out of prison the day he broke INTO OUR TRUCK! Yeah, a repeat low life that didn’t learn his lesson.

I hope when they catch him, and they will cause they know who he is… I hope he is a HUGE homophobic and that he gets raped, repeatedly by the biggest buy with the biggest cock in the whole prison.. EVERYDAY!

With what he stole, and the damage that he has done to our car, it is grand theft larceny. A felony. He won’t be going to pretty boy jail, he is facing prison time. I can only pray that right now, the guy that will make him his bitch is taking a male enhancement pill, or using a penis pump to get ready for his new friend! And I hope he hates every minute of it. Every second of it. That is one thought that brings a smile to my face. An evil little smirk grows across my face as I think about it.

Call me mean. Call me fucked up. You can call me whatever you want, as long as someone calls him, their bitch.

I take pride in what we have. And we work hard for it. Its ours. No one has the right to take it from us. So in the end, he will get his.

MTV YOU SUCK!

Below My rant is what I got from the Time Warner Website:

MAke your 6 figure execs take a pay cut. Lay off the bonuses and the “Business” spending accounts. This is BULLSHIT! In an economy SO bad right now, we keep our cable cause its one of the few “extras” we can afford.. you selfish greedy bastards! all the channels we will now lose. I will boycott MTV from this day on. Greedy asses

Lets see how good your “reality” shows do now when then don’t have ANY VIEWERS!  Happy New Year to you Greedy fuckers!

My daughter is going to be devestated when At Midnight Time Warner is going to be dropping not only her favorite channel, Noggin,  shes already in tears.

And unfortunately,  when losing these 16 channels, our cable bill will be be reduced because these are “free” channels. I know Time Warner is doing this to protect us, the customers from paying more but damn.

And I don’t want anyone leaving me comments about Doing something else with my child other than tv. I might have to karate chop you in the knee cap. She watches Noggin in the morning before school. While I am cooking dinner or doing dishes. We watch it together. She don’t watch it all day. Its winter out. We like to cuddle on the couch and watch EDUCATIONAL TV! So don’t judge, just keep on moving past MY blog and go some place else if you have any smart comments. I am not in the mood.

Noggin is Commercial free- educational tv. Not like some of these stupid cartoons now adays, like the Bratz, dressed like little hootchies and caring and talking about nothing but makeup, clothes and boys.

Its good shows. Educational. And I, along with everyone else I have talked to, are outraged by this.

It may not be their fault, but this is crazy! I will admit at first I was PISSED at Time Warner. I even went as far as to call them and ask what was going on. ONLY then did I learn it was MTV and its affiliates wanted to TRIPLE our rates! I apologize for getting ready to boycott Time Warner. But I got my facts straight and I am now placing my anger and outrage at the RIGHT ppl.

Here is what I found on Time Warner Website:

We are negotiating earnestly, honestly and fairly with MTV Networks, but so far have been unable to reach an agreement or get an extension.

MTV Networks may pull its channels from your lineup on January 1st.Read a Statement from Glenn Britt, President & CEO, Time Warner Cable >>• MTV Networks wants our customers to pay millions more.  They are currently demanding price increases that are nearly triple the rate of increase under our current agreement. These increases would be excessive even in a strong economy, but given the current conditions, it’s simply not fair to our customers. • MTV’s demands are outrageous and would force our customers to pay millions of dollars more per year. MTV’s networks are not worth so much more today than they were yesterday, especially given the fact that their ratings are mostly declining in recent years. • Much of their popular programming is also available for free online. In this economy, we don’t believe it’s appropriate to ask our customers to pay so much more for programming with declined ratings or that’s available for free. • We’ve successfully negotiated hundreds of programming agreements with other cable networks, many within the last few months. Our hope is that we will come to an agreement with MTV Networks that is fair to our customers.

Yes Brooklyn, Jesus closes his eyes.

My daughter cracks me up.

A few months ago her Gamma, Brad’s Mom, told her that when she grows up Jesus will let her get pregnant.  Brooklyn is 5 at this time and she is always asking grown up questions already.
Where do babies come from. What is sex. Will it hurt when I have babies… do they HAVE to cut the babies out? No brooklyn. Then how do they come out mommy? Like When I poop? UGH! lol

So yeah, she came home from that visit with Gamma BAWLING for a week straight cause she didn’t want Jesus to make her pregnant. So I told her the truth. She didn’t have to have kids if SHE didn’t want to. That wasn’t good enough. She still cried, so I prayed with her and we told Jesus together that she didn’t want to get pregnant. That seemed to calm her down and I thought that was the end of it.

A few days later she asks me If having kids hurt. The truth is yes, but you can’t tell a 5 year old that, who is already petrified to get pregnant. So I told her she didn’t have to get pregnant to have kids. She could adopt. That put an end to that.

And then again a coupel of days later so told me she was going to adopt six kids. Cause she loves kids. Shes going to be an AWESOME mommy. (Those were her words)

“Mommy, I am going to adopt a brown baby, a black one, a chinese baby, and one white one.”"Brooklyn”, I said, “that is 4, I thought you said 6?”

“Yes Mommy, those 4 plus any other babies that need a home. I am leaving my options open” LMAO Too cute.

For the last 2 years, yes since she was 3, she’s been telling me that she DON’T want to grow up. She don’t want to be a grown up. She wants to stay little. And oh how I would love that. But trying to explain it to her, and explain to her why every year shes bigger when she don’t want to be is an impossible task.

She don’t want to grow up and get a boyfriend. She don’t want to move out. She don’t want to give up her barbies and Blankie.

His mom tells her the strangest things to tell a kid. “Jesus will take mommy and daddy one day up to heaven” That pissed me off to say the least. I went through months and months of tears and her “yelling” at Jesus to leave me and daddy alone. That is one conversation I will not have with her right now. She busts into tears anytime anyone brings up heaven. Or death.I know she is going to learn in time that mommy and daddy will not always be here. But the last thing I need is, God forbid, something to happen to me or Brad and have her hate and blame jesus for it.

So the only answer that I can give her to that is “no matter where mommy and daddy are, we will always be with you, love you , and watch over you.”

I don’t mind my daughter being taught about God and Jesus, but I don’t need anyone scaring her into believing, or scaring her so she don’t believe.

The funniest thing she has EVER said to me was one night I was putting her in the shower, due to the lack of a bath tub in our house, and she wouldn’t take any of her clothes off. Cause his mom told her that “jesus sees EVERYTHING”.  And she says no guys or boys are allowed to see her undies. LMAO

So we had to tell Jesus, AND Santa, who can also see everything, to close their eyes! LMAO
Sometimes I think she catches on to stuff that is too hard for her to wrap her little mind around. In some ways she knows way to much for a 5 year old. I want to keep her innocent and sweet and not have to worry about death, and Higher powers and Santa seeing her undies.

She is a very private person. From the time she was 2, dad wasn’t allowed to give her a bath, change her diapers pull up or clothes. She’s private. And I am glad. Same with Grandpa and any uncles or her brother.

I’d keep her little forever if  I could. I am sure any parent would. Bless her little heart!

Heading West

So I have been thinking. If given the chance, and I could go anywhere I wanted to settle down, where would I go?

Easy answer is I would go West. Where West? I am not sure. I am in Ohio, so West is the best place to head. East of me doesn’t seem like a good choice.

Arizona. Montana. Washington State. New Mexico. Anywhere West. Far from Ohio. Far from everything I would want to run from.

Go West, start over. Reinvent myself.  Become someone else. Disappear from here and get away from the crap that surrounds my life. Get away from the Thunder Storm and Rain that hovers over me. Where no one can find me but those I take with me.

I know I am strong enough. I know I have it in me.

Colorful Light Up Socks

I am weird. I like weird things. Things that glow. Light up. Blink. Dangle. I am weird.

I buy weird socks. I buy ugly socks. Musical socks. Socks that match nothing in my closet or dresser drawers. If I have to wear socks everyday, why not make my choices interesting?

I would decorate my house with 70’s Beads in every doorway of my house if Brad would allow me to.

And by frilly dangley pillow and blankets and just about anything that dingle dangled.

I would have blinking twinkling crap all over my house. But lets be realistic here, I can’t do that.  So I keep my weird obsessions limited to my socks.

We go out some place nice, dressed up. If I am wearing boots, you can bet your pay check i have on weird socks.

If I have pants on – weird socks are there.Plain white socks are just so.. plain. And uncomfortable to wear. After you wear em once and wash em.. they never fit the same.

So weird, my socks will remain.

I told Brad, should anything ever happen to me.. bury me in sweats, a soft comfy sweatshirt, hair in a pony tail, and my weird socks. and of course lets not forget some colorful, weird character slipper. *I have tons to chose from*

I can’t have purple hair, I have to be presentable on the outside, so my feet do the weird walking in my life.

Socks – I love me. The weirder, the better.

I love my socks.

WTH!

Some nerve! I wake up this morning only to find Xmas is on ly 3 days away! Why was I not consulted about this? I do not agree with it being only 3 days away!!!

I still have so much to do.  SO MUCH! And not ONE thing I have bought is wrapped. NOT ONE THING!

By the time my daughter goes to bed, i am exhausted and just fall onto the couch where i remain till i sleep walk up to the bed.

I have tons of stuff to do to get ready b4 Xmas eve when both of our families show up for Dinner. Starting tonight we are going to start cooking. Yeah, thats right, it takes us that long.

10 pounds of potato salad and 10 pounds of beans and weenies – we have to start cooking tonight.

We are having gift exchange with my sister and her family tomorrow, and I still haven’t got my niece anything. That might have something to do with the fact that I couldn’t find the ONE thing she insisted on having. I am going to have to come up with my own gift idea. damn it man!

So much to do. And yet, here i sit venting my frustration out on the computer, into a blog instead of doing what i need to do.. why? Cause i have been at it since 9 this morning  a nd it is now 5:36 pm and I am finally taking a break.

although I am almost done, I still have a whole world of tasks weighing down on my shoulders. grrrrrrrrrrr…

So next year, Dear Santa, I am asking that you give me a little more notice before Xmas sneaks up on me 0- only 3 days away. This is unacceptable!

Oh, did I mention that tonight when my husband went to work – we lost all oil pressure in truck, yet AGAIN! So now I have to take time out of all the free time I have tomorrow (Note the sarcasm in my typing) to get that fixed, AGAIN! Bah Humbug. Scrooge don’t have anything on me this year!!!

Happy holidays to all of you out there that are happy happy and full of singing caroling joy. Blah to you.

On a side note: though I am venting and complaining, this is actaully my favorite time of year! LOL i love the holidays. Even if I am beyond frustrated. But I am every year. Its one of my holiday traditions!

A Letter To Myself

IF I could write a letter to myself and sent it back in time, this is what I would say,

When you’re 5, hug your cousin and make one memory with him before he dies. You will always wish that you had.

When your 10 and you are living with your aunt and uncle, cause you just moved back from Florida… Hang in there. You won’t be there long. Protect your sister and never leave her alone.

When your 16, and he’s breaking your heart you’re going to do fine. This is the milestone for when you learned to be strong. Its a hard reality to have to live through, but it makes you so much stronger in the end.

When you’re growing up, find someone other than your uncle to be close to. It will save years of scars and pain.

Don’t keep everything to yourself. Tell your Mom, she will end up being one of your greatest friends. She can help.

Still get mad at your sister over the cottage cheese, turns out to be a great family joke in the future.

Call Mark back, and invite them over for drinks. This will end up saving his life.

in 2000 Make peace with the family before Grandpa dies. So you can tell him goodbye before its too late. You should not have to be the one to say sorry, but do it anyways. And listen to his stories, you are going to cherish those memories and pass them on to your daughter.

You think Liz is your friend, but trust me, she won’t be. At the party, when she starts talking to you, be a bitch. Keep her away from your family and kick her ass before the end of the night. One good ass kicking in the beginning and maybe she will think twice before she ruins your family.

Hug Chris. Hug Aunt Susie. They will be gone long before you are ready to let them go. Make tons of memories of them in Pennsylvania on Vacation.

On Market Street, don’t leave your bedroom window unlocked. That is how the neighbor breaks in and steals all your stuff. (P.S.) He will be a convicted child molester, keep your daughter away)

Trust your instincts, you are right more than you are wrong. Listen to what your head and heart are telling you. It will end up saving you more than once.

Have fun. Smile. Enjoy being young and a kid. You are going to grow up soon enough. Enjoy your friends, you will all part ways after you graduate and you will all go separate ways.

Most importantly, when your 21 and getting ready to sign the papers to join the Air Force, forget to set your alarm so you miss your appt. That missed appt leaves you sitting right here at this computer writing this letter.

Have adventures.

Enjoy your vacation in Vegas.

Make time for the little things.

Don’t let the little things that go wrong to eat at ya.

Took a step

So I took that first step and called the hospital down in Texas to see how my dad was doing. Hes stable now, but still in critical condition. He responds when asked a question by blinking his eyes for yes and no. He is still not talking. his vital are starting to stable out and his labs came back good. He died on the table and they brought him back. He has a lung infection, and hes starting to recognize ppl.

I talked to a few of my Aunts down there that I have met a couple times while they were visiting here.

I am more confused then ever before when it comes to my dad. Some of the stuff they told me. I don’t know. All I can say is that I made that first step and called the hospital. I left that door open should he chose to walk through it when he gets better.

No matter what happens from all this, it will change everything. Should he walk through that door that I opened, I could end up having a dad. Should he not, then that door is closed and I no longer have to wonder about “what could be”, “what if….” I will know one way or the other.

I am not entirely sure if I made the right decision. But when I stopped to think of “it might be too late” I figured it might be now or never so I took that step and called. If I am making a mistake, I will learn in time. If I am not, then I have nothing to worry about, right? I took a chance that I might not get again. I guess I will learn in time if it was the right thing to do or not…………

My aunt told me that my dad was still an alcoholic. And that maybe now, he will go into rehab and get some help. They believed he OD’d. But they aren’t sure and not sure what it could have been.

Almost too late

So, as anyone who has read my blog in the past knows about the relationship with me and my dad… or lack thereof…..

Today I get a letter from my Tia (aunt) Rosie telling me that my dad is in the hospital in San Antonio, in critical condition. She didn’t say what happened or anything else. This is all I know.

I am torn. I am thinking in my mind ” It could be too late for me to form a relationship with my dad. It might be my last chance”. But my heart is saying ” its  been too late for too long”. Or my heart and head are switched around. I dont know.

Im not sure if I should be wanting to rush down there in case this is the last chance. To get off my chest everything I have ever wanted to say. Or to maybe get that  approving and I have missed so much look. Or If I should just leave well enough alone. My anger and hurt is genuine, and I am not in the wrong no matter what I really feel. Cause they are my feelings. But I am torn and confused and there is no where to turn to get the right answer.

In the end I will pray for him. Pray for his recovery and stay right here in Ohio where I have been all my life. Where he has known I have been. Some ppl may think its wrong. Some ppl may say I should make the first step toward him. There is no right answer. There is no wrong answer. There is just me and my life, and the lack of a father growing up. When I say lack of a father growing up, I don’t just mean my dad. I mean any dad. I have never had a dad. Not a step dad, not a boyfriends of my moms, nothing. It would have been nice to have him around when I was little, even if it was just a few weekends a year…… I’m grown now. I don’t need a dad now. I needed one then. Sometimes I wonder how life would have been growing up with a dad (any dad) in the house…. I can’t even imagine.

I have learned through these conversations with my aunt that I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters in Texas. That grew up with a dad.  I’m happy for them. So he is not alone………